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11/11/2022 0 Comments

Needs are Non-Negotiable


"Getting yours needs met is non-negotiable. It may not be the way you want it, or by whom, but it must happen."
Billy Lee Myers
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This got me thinking about the bridge between our inner world (desires and needs) and our outer world (the real world):
-- Too much weight on our inner world: Results in trying to "force our will" on the outer world, controlling, manipulating
-- Too much weight on our outer world: Results in "victim mentality," lack of action, entropy
-- Equal Balance- Flow, natural unfolding, openness

Here is the activity I use to balance the two:
Activity:
What is my perceived need/desire?
What are the themes hidden here?
Is there a way I can reconstruct these themes so that I can get my need/desire met in a way that is congruent with the reality around me?
​
Example:
Need/Desire- Vacation in Aruba with my best friend
Reality- Can't afford that vacation right now (timewise or money-wise), my best friend isn't available
Themes- need for a break from work, desire for warmth and sunshine and love from a dear friend
New Reconstruction- 3 day weekend where I invite three of my closest friends for a device-free weekend at my house with a "you are my sunshine" theme- everyone wears yellow, we play that song in the backgrounds long with some Carribean music, drink martinis, play some outdoor games, and have quality cuddle time
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Side-note: Bridging the reality of ones inner world (desires and needs) with ones out world (the real world) is not always easy. But it IS the place we play in, whether we want to acknowledge it or not. Mastery is having the tools and wisdom to do it well.

There IS a place where my desires and reality meets. THAT is the place I want to be..

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Speaking of besties, I'm missing this girl so much Sofia Spolaor Etges
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