On Playing with Desire...
Knowing that I have responsive desire has CHANGED THE GAME for me in my physical interactions.
How I play with responsive desire:
-- I create contexts that work FOR ME (I create the night that will turn ME on and invite my partner into that)
-- I let my partner know what contexts work for me so they choose to help co-create these contexts with me
-- I take as much care of my physical, emotional needs before-hand so my body feels as safe as possible to open into my present moment
-- I inform my partner of my desire-style and let them know what that means for me
-- Part of my "connection speech" is to let my partner know that I may be open to s-x, but I need to have that off the table until it arises as a desire in my body and that it may/ or may not get to that
-- I only play with people that I trust are comfortable with the above and can love/play/co-create with me in whatever level desire arises.
Differing desires styles is TOTALLY OKAY. It is being able to own your style and then co-create with a willing partner that to me, has changed the game..